weights connoisseur @alice_meows@awoo.space

safety tip: next time you seize an illegal shipment of ammonium nitrate, don't just throw it in some warehouse to blow up and level half your city years later. instead, mix it with diesel and start a state funded racing team!

introducing the Problematic Fuels Only Racing League! the rules are simple:

• your fuel must be dangerous and impractical, as approved by a panel of judges
• no rockets or turbines! your fuel must go into a piston engine
• go!

ammonium perchlorate powered car. replace the fuel injectors with magazines full of tiny replica space shuttle SRBs

ANFO powered car

oxy acetylene powered car

imagine you have a garden. you have several lettuce plants, but there's one in particular where all the neighborhood dogs come by and piss on it. this happens at least once a day, throughout the plant's entire life from the moment it first sprouted. it's time to harvest! do you:

just put some hepa filters on the nozzle part it'll be fine. maybe a heatsink on the tube going to the turbine. what do you mean it'll blow up? obviously you have to build it pretty strong, c'mon guys i'm not the engineer here

also, we waste so much effort keeping nuclear power plant reactions under control. why not just

new car idea: take a regular internal combustion engine, make it a bit stronger, and just do Project Orion inside the cylinders

i wonder if there are any organic human languages out there with strict quoting and escaping rules. there should be

hey remember when 99.9 BOB FM's slogan was "the 80s, the 90s, what ever"? well I'll bet by now it's like, "the 80s, the 90s, the 2 thousands, the 2010s, the whatever!"

forklift seller, I am going into battle, and I require your strongest forklifts

god remember ads? they were so bad

real life is bullshit. you can translate, and rotate, but you can't mirror or scale!

repurpose the entire military industrial complex for battlebots

someone's gonna crash a boat into the Barcelona World Trade Center and the blockchain's gonna fork over the resulting debate

that scene in The Wire where they are revisiting that crime scene and the only thing they say is "fuck" back and forth to each other while discovering new evidence? that but they're saying "sus"

small animals: "I must make myself wretched before the humans so as to be petted"

@synthgal no those were all individual components of 9/11

(there's only 1 coin so far...)