Suvvin' Bengêsko Zhukel @Silviu@awoo.space

I'm so tired

I'm sitting in my car trying to collect myself so I'm not a mess while driving.

My medical care consists of managing:

*my transition
*Ehlers Danlos Syndrome
*Fibromyalgia
*Chronic Fatigue Syndrome
*Hemiplegic/Chronic Migraines
*ADHD
My meds literally allow me to keep working. Without them, I'd need to be on disability.

Losing all my fsa to a failure labelled as insurance was a devastating blow to my budget and I know I can't recover without help. Things like my legal name change are out of the picture for a LONG TIME, if not permanently.

Dental insurance screwed me over and now I'm out 1600$ for my medical care.

Will be setting up my patreon soon as well as a proper site for tarot readings, because I don't make enough money from my full time job to take care of my bills as well as my healthcare.

Gino has a very important message for you all:

BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEP🐦

Drew my fiancee's fursona ♥

If you're feeling unloved and hated bc Rowling is a fucking T/ERF, please know that K.A. Applegate has a trans daughter she loves and supports 100%.

Animorphs are not for T/ERFS, and the author loves you, my trans sisters.

When you didn't sleep well, but you're on your first dose of Adderall in three months and you feel like a humming bird wearing a lead jacket.

Bit the bullet and went to the doc. Got a refill on my Adderall and amitriptyline! Also had my rib manipulated back into place.

I was supposed to call the doctor to make an appointment but I'm in so much pain I can't see myself getting out of bed.

I fucking sneezed and popped a rib out of place and it now hurts to breathe, but I'm out of fsa and can't afford to see a doctor, even with insurance.

I should be on disability but it doesn't pay the car note or rent.

So I go to work with a partially dislocated rib and hope it stays where it is and doesn't fuck with my lung because I can't afford to do otherwise.

I'm so tired of living with pain and having to fight for rest that never comes and never does what it should in a normal person.

I'm tired of having joints sublux, tired of costochondritis, tired of migraines, tired of being tired. And in top of all of it, I'm tired of being chronically ill and in pain and BROKE

That was one of the few things keeping my pain in check and now I can't use it because the band is gone and I can't afford to replace it.

It's "I wish I were dead so I wouldn't have to wish for sleep that won't come because of the pain" o'clock

So I used my fsa to get a Quell, and to my surprise, it actually helped with my pain levels. Kept them from going over a six, which says something, because I can't take anything stronger than 800mg of ibuprofen or it makes me sleep.

BUT I fucking lost the band to my Quell.

It's not coeliac, BTW, thankfully. I finally got those test results and my tga was 1 (4-6 or greater is positive for coeliac)

Just means I have a different form of skin problem and ibs, but I already know about the Ehlers Danlos, so Idek anymore.

I just know I should technically be in disability, but I can't afford it, and don't know how/if it'd affect me immigranting to New Zealand