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I'll need y'all to entertain me after therapy today, I will have like an hour to kill

Chimerror boosted

nsfw, non-euclidean genitals, graphic fripping, arena hypnosis 

BEGIN SUPERTHOUGHT: "tagging disingenuously tame toots with obviously wild-ass CW tags" is the new Masto version of "endless chains of quote tweets with stuff like 'thread, inspirational, real shit, i wept my eyes out for days' on them"

From birdsite 

RT @uhshanti@twitter.com
you know how Wile E. Coyote looks at Road Runner and sees a chicken drumstick? when I look at Jeff Bezos I hallucinate 300,000 public housing units

Chimerror boosted

Keep a Master Ball in your hip pocket to threaten your Pokefriends with a lifetime of friendship if they keep putting themselves down.

mah jong 

This is the biggest hand I've ever gotten in any mah jong game, much less !

lewd 

Now I need to get horny because I have a sperm donation.

money (-) 

I still need to buy my tickets home and pay for sperm storage and actually buy Christmas presents this year and aaaaaaa

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money (-) 

I really need to stop eating out so much and driving in to work, but it's really a difference in time spent doing things I like doing.

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money (-) 

I basically got prodded into paying half a bill, and it got approved but it hasn't cleared yet, and neither has my rent check and something's gonna overdraw so I'm trying not to make it worse and I actually have charges on my credit card, and there's probably enough credit but aaaaaaa

Just venting, don't need any particular help, I'll be fine come Friday.

crude language, sex mention, racism? 

I assume for Mexicans, Celito Lindo is a proud song. It is for me too, I just know it as "Freshmen never eat pussy".

Chimerror boosted

I don't want to move, but all the cool kids are going to snouts...

From birdsite 

RT @SuperbooDraws@twitter.com
small brain: tf into something bc its neat
normal brain: tf into something bc of horny
galaxy brain: tf into something energetic to stop being tired

From birdsite 

RT @NineJackals@twitter.com
Kapernick hates it when you pay my friends for commissions and leave fat tips.

From birdsite 

RT @KotepTeef@twitter.com
needs to be more tf that plays with degrees of furriness
where they get big meaty paws as they turn into a barbarian
or bimbo tf where their claws become long nails instead

uspol, Kavenaugh 

Seems this hearing is devolving into a circus as the Dems find some backbone for once.

I don't know how to feel, honestly the accelerationist in me wants this to be the spark of a second civil war with the chance to fix the broken Constitution, but that's a monstrous desire, isn't it?

From birdsite 

RT @FENNERGY@twitter.com
(Furries)

2008: tee hee I'm nightshadowdark I'm a widdle raver folfie x3 if u ask nicewy I might just lift my tail ;3

2018: hey nice to meet you I'm Jack the fox I work mainly as a Barrister, my friend Darren the dog here is a consultant psychiatrist

From birdsite 

RT @Fauvfox@twitter.com
Commission for @HuskyZephyr@twitter.com

At first they're a bit shocked at the change as their snout and ears start to grow outward but over all they seem to be very pleased with the end result (:

From birdsite 

RT @fursona_bot@twitter.com
my fursona is gay

Chimerror boosted

tf kink 

@sudo_bee alternate bonus points if they just tf you into yourself but without the dysphoria and self doubt that keeps you from seeing yourself clearly

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