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flight attendant: is there a doctor on board?
dad: *nudge*
plane: *violently turns over to the side and plummets to the ground due to its poor build quality*

😺✏ — "Would you like to be able to see into your own future? 👀" - half scared to but sure curiouscat.me/mexicanwilddog/p

a tv station in san diego county has a favorite jams playlist and it's all korn

sometimes i listen to bands from the myspace era and wonder where they are now

in elementary i went to a schoolmate's birthday party and when i found out one of my friends was coming i got scared they would see me there and think i was no longer friends with him and that i was friends with the schoolmate instead so i left early

if you have bitcoin as your icon in the year of our lord 2019 i will assume your intentions are nefarious even if you do not see yourself as that way

just renamed all of my memes in my meme folder to find them better

why call it thanksgiving when you can call it the national dog show day

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why call it thanksgiving when you can call it the alice's restaurant massacree anniversary day

currently amusing myself by watching the frys electronics subreddit and forums discussing the empty shelves and eventual upcoming death of the stores

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