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Depression, suicide (---) 

@jdlwerewolf@snouts.online This is probably going to sound incredibly harsh, but I've been in that situation myself many times before and there is a chance you're being manipulated. :/ There's absolutely nothing wrong with taking a step back to make sure you don't end up sinking yourself & let someone else handle it if their problems are indeed genuine - if it's somehow framed as if only you could ever have helped and you're a bad person for looking after yourself, run.

@body@mastodon.social Make sure to keep it pretty fast too, or you'll end up accidentally making New Beat.

half-naked but SFW sketch of a werewolf, implied alcohol use 

capturing that new year's day mood

rough sketch for shits 'n giggles to start off the year, messing with the more humanoid end of Vera's sliding scale o' forms I guess~

CST folks be like we we we we (weeeeeeee) aaaaare in FEEEEEAAAAAAARRRR

alcohol 

we ain't got flying cars yet but I sure as fuck feel like I'm flying right now let me fucking tell you

@JulieSqveakaroo ...

*gently holds in those big, protective werewolf arms of hers*

@JulieSqveakaroo *offers gentle hugs*

I'm so sorry the people around you managed to put this kind of existential rage into you. :/

discussing bad shit from the olden days, re: therian business, birdhell 

@IceWolf I mean I won't lie, I've seen people in the fandom and adjacent spaces be accepting of nonhuman folks while rejecting transness or even queerness in general in the same breath. Which... regardless of how much of a double standard that is in and of itself, I'd always seen nonhumanity as even more of a taboo subject than being trans, if only because I'd actually -heard- of trans people being a thing that exists growing up.

re: therian business, birdhell 

@IceWolf It is! I'm just blown away by the contrast between this and how coming out as trans went back when that happened, is all.

re: therian business, birdhell 

yeah, yeah, I know follower counts don't actually mean shit and those numbers are basically only there to make you feel anxious enough to (hopefully) only ever post content the Algorithm™ likes and all, but fuckin'.

It feels like acceptance about basically all this shit has improved pretty radically over the past decade? Or maybe I just shed all the shitty people back in '14, who knows. Either way, I'm honestly glad that all got a positive reception, ahaha.

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therian business, birdhell 

Honestly, lowkey amazed that the thread in which I confess to feeling basically not at all like I'm an actual human being is the one thread I make in recent days that *doesn't* make me instantly lose followers.

I mean sure, I normally post -maybe- one thing in a given day that isn't a reply to friends/acquaintances overall and most of the people dropping off previously when I started yelling about how you should just go "fuck the cops and anyone like them" for your own sake were probably just random people I never knew well who only followed me on a content basis to begin with, but.

This sure is a -massive- fucking difference from when I came out as trans back in 2014 over something that, honestly, I'd always thought would be more controversial than that.

decade in review kinda thing 

I've already launched off into a short thread on this over on birdhell, but yeah.

The 2010s have been... one hell of a time for me. Started them out by becoming an adult on paper, and... honestly I dare say the vast majority of my development as a person happened after that point. It's an understatement to say I've basically spent this entire decade picking up pieces of myself that I'd lost over the course of my life before that - from figuring out my sexuality at the very beginning of the decade, to coming to terms with the fact I'm trans, to the nearly decade long DID break that followed after that... only to finally come together as a person again and pick up a very lycanthropy-shaped last piece of myself last summer, that I'd thought had just been a temporary thing that had vanished after I turned 19 or so only to smack me *right* in the face with itself.

Planning to finally just come out with all that over on Twitter too because I'm sick of hiding things about myself, but suffice to say, that whole thing had been bubbling underneath the surface for years upon years.

As for everything else... well. Graduated high school, crashed out of college and had to come to terms with the fact I'm simply not at all fit to work in a capitalist environment, went way off the beaten path, got a whole *bunch* of other shit flung at me and... honestly, while it sucked in the moment I'm kind of glad it happened, overall? I've grown tremendously as a person since.

Speaking of personal growth, meeting all of you lovely people, both here in the Fediverse and elsewhere in my life helped tremendously with that, and I can't state often enough that I couldn't have gotten to where I am without y'all. 💙 I'll forever be thankful for that, and as rocky as this decade's been for probably all of us, let's make sure the next one's better.

To 2020.

sudden realization: today is the one day in the entire decade you can tell from the first digit of someone's age alone what decade they were born in

I mean unless they're over a hundred years old I guess

@Zeny@snouts.online Happy new year, aaaaa 💙🐺

here's hoping the 20s end up treating you better 💙

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