Nettle Briar @Ulfra_Wolfe@awoo.space

I consider it... humbling? Like co-existence with others requires all this complexity, and even then we have all these things in the way. Us existing is amazing but complicated.

But I love being able to *hug* someone... that we take for granted more than we know. Just the experience of holding onto someone for comfort takes all sorts of physical meatbag steps and sensation

Show love to someone you care about today! Take a moment to realize your connections with others, appreciate them, and tell them you appreciate them. <3

Have you thought about the fact that when you see something, it's already done and gone? By the time your brain processes it and it's time to react, the thing is in the past. You are reacting to things well after they occur.

"Well after" is relative, but when you step outside of time, time as a concept, a single second can be an eternity

Just... boom. New soul again, losing all that I had and was, all that willpower, all that enlightenment, all that knowledge and wisdom, back to being a seed again. And the part that made it hellish was the knowledge I was forgetting people, but it was something I had to fight.
Whether the wheel turns again and I end up reincarnated, whether I'd end up on another plane of existence or whatever... that forgetting is what I'm afraid of.

A part of me is so worried that that is like the afterlife. Just... leaving the body and getting fuzzy. That I'd lose all those memories of others, but still exist as some half-life form. I could easily see it that way too -- all that I experienced, just never remembering Hazel and Willow and never struggling to get back to them.

I am so HAPPY to be in a place with people in it now. I appreciate life so much more now. It's shocking how much we take for granted -- even our basic senses of feeling, of being able to hug onto a *person*.

Can't stop crying. I feel so good to be back in reality again, haha. But also I miss the playground, but can't remember anything about it.

Thinking back to it, though, that feeling of being back in first grade? It was pleasant.

Like a mixture of playground in daylight, indoor play area, etc.

It was more fear of losing those I cared about by staying there too long that made me afraid.

But then afterwards I realized that I could have been there forever and lost sight of myself. It was pleasant, but terrifying?

I'm still crying over it. That suffocating feeling of half-life. Like I was being kept back from anything by this foam all around.

Update on Salvia trip: That was traumatizing and difficult to explain.

Felt like I was back in First Grade, in a way, but ... it's more a feeling than a vision. Tried to crawl back to Hazel and Willow, but I felt like I couldn't, felt paralyzed to see them for so long, and it was so so hard to just be there in a half-existence with these fuzzy recollections of those I cared about.

Spokle drew Nettle, my trans ewe with horns!

https://awoo.space/media/thGdNuXIivr_rYisiOY

We are getting some salvia in and I am hoping they will help Willow with her visions of her past, and help me get visions that i feel blocked off from.

No bigot will destroy us. No system will erase us. No one will shove us back into the closet. We are here to stay.

Had some Blue Heron mixed with Blue Dream wax and wooooooooow. <3

Co-exist with the animals.

Anatole France: ‘the law, in its majestic equality, forbids the rich as well as the poor to sleep under bridges, to beg in the streets, and to steal bread.’