weights connoisseur @alice_meows@awoo.space

imagine you have a garden. you have several lettuce plants, but there's one in particular where all the neighborhood dogs come by and piss on it. this happens at least once a day, throughout the plant's entire life from the moment it first sprouted. it's time to harvest! do you:

just put some hepa filters on the nozzle part it'll be fine. maybe a heatsink on the tube going to the turbine. what do you mean it'll blow up? obviously you have to build it pretty strong, c'mon guys i'm not the engineer here

also, we waste so much effort keeping nuclear power plant reactions under control. why not just

new car idea: take a regular internal combustion engine, make it a bit stronger, and just do Project Orion inside the cylinders

i wonder if there are any organic human languages out there with strict quoting and escaping rules. there should be

hey remember when 99.9 BOB FM's slogan was "the 80s, the 90s, what ever"? well I'll bet by now it's like, "the 80s, the 90s, the 2 thousands, the 2010s, the whatever!"

forklift seller, I am going into battle, and I require your strongest forklifts

god remember ads? they were so bad

real life is bullshit. you can translate, and rotate, but you can't mirror or scale!

repurpose the entire military industrial complex for battlebots

someone's gonna crash a boat into the Barcelona World Trade Center and the blockchain's gonna fork over the resulting debate

that scene in The Wire where they are revisiting that crime scene and the only thing they say is "fuck" back and forth to each other while discovering new evidence? that but they're saying "sus"

small animals: "I must make myself wretched before the humans so as to be petted"

(there's only 1 coin so far...)

a new proof of work coin where you have to do 9/11 to mine a block

downside: some crypto fuck will find this, screenshot it, and sell it as an NFT for $69 trillion dollars

my new NFT platform is live! https://alice.systems/nfts/

petition to ban the manufacture and sale of unsalted peanuts

which is prettier? pls share

What's up with doorbells?