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Co-worker, walking into my office holding succulent: You know about plants right?
Me: Some?
Co-worker: Can I separate this plant up or do I need to repot?
Me: No idea. Google it.
Co-worker: Okay, it's a succubus, right?
Me: Succulent. It's a succulent.
Co-worker:What's the difference?
Me: a succubus drains your soul through sex. A succulent is a plant.
Co-worker: Wow, okay. I guess a succubus would be a really odd gift to give a co-worker.

my completionist nature doesn't just show up in video games. i also try not to leave any grains of rice on my plate when i have chinese food

just trans problems 

tfw a package isn't delivered because you have to sign for it but you had it shipped to you under your new (not yet official) name and have no idea what to do now

Boost if you are a transgender cyborg created to destroy civilisation.

1st cyberpunk body mod: cat ears
2nd mod: a new internal system that doesn't get kidney stones, for maximum mtn dew consumption
3rd mod: body only needs dew and pizza to survive

cw: subtooting all cuties

tfw you're crushing on a mutual but too scared to tell them 😓😫

trans stuff, body stuff, gross stuff 

so uh, estrogen has made things smell way different "down there" and uh, not in a good way necessarily >_<

i mean like even after washing it and stuff, that smell lingers

cat picture 

look at my cat laying on a giant teddy bear

not pictured: me, over to the left, sleeping on half the bed while the other half is covered in boxes because i'm a disaster

I'll be honest, doctor, I really just want these pills to turn me into a digital catgirl

self-esteem 

i really want people to like me and it feels bad when i don't get as much attention as i was hoping for. i want everyone to be like "oh lilac you're so cute" and tacklehug me

So I hate to just blurt this out all of a sudden, but a friend of mine could really use your help.

He lives in Portland and is about to get evicted from his residence and all of his contingencies have either fallen through or flaked out on him.

He has a car, an at-home job, and is able to support his board, just not a room.

If you have or know someone with a spare bedroom within 18 hours of Portland, please DM me. And I would really appreciate if you could boost this for visibility!!

selfie - wanna see me looking grumpy before a therapy appointment on tuesday? well great then here you go 

i felt much better after therapy though!

hey so, to be a twitch affiliate, all I need left is 50 followers... I already have 32, think we can get me there? 'u' twitch.tv/flutterbug

99 bottles of beer on the wall.
(99 bottles of beer)
You take one down;
the wall collapses.
That beer was load-bearing.

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