Do you think my primary care doctor could prescribe me just one week worth of Valium?

No, I've never been diagnosed with autism. Why do you ask?

Show thread

Over the weekend I went to one of those haunted house places. It was fun!

Things that are scary:
❌ Carefully composed horror scene
✅ An actor is blocking my way and I don't know what's expected of me

Hooray for early voting. Fast, easy, no line.

Won't make a difference in the presidential because my state is 💯 blue but the senate race matters and I got to vote for a state constitutional amendment to protect abortion access.

Just saw Smile 2. It rules.

How do they cast for these? Does every audition start with "Show me your fucked up smile."?

Dumb meme referencing a porn site 

I may be the only person in the world in the target audience for this, but it entered my mind and would not leave.

boosted

I hate how companies are settling on the ✨ emoji to represent AI features. I liked that emoji!

The beach volleyball venue below the Eiffel Tower is an incredible flex by France and I truly respect it.

@Draekos The dog assisted run was fun again. Ken Griffey Jr baseball for snes.

I wonder how long I could trap a man in an elevator by refusing to exit first.

Playing the free NYT games every morning in bed as a benchmark to see if I'm actually awake. If I can't solve Wordle, I shouldn't be driving to work.

I went to the Udvar-Hazy air and space museum today. I knew it was cool but the only specific thing I remembered was here was the Blackbird. I basically got jump scared by the Enola Gay. There's also a Concorde and a space shuttle. This place is incredible.

@kauko It seems that way. It almost caused me trouble because it remembered a one-time address for a wedding gift as the default, and I accidentally sent the next thing I ordered there too. Thankfully it was just some KN95s and not something more awkward...

@atpfm @siracusa A machine in the shape of a laptop but with the safety of an iPad would surely be an "iBook", right?

I think of a lot of my stories as being "Twilight Zone but horny". Like, it's a mostly normal world as far as the main character knows, but then something weird [horny] happens and they have to deal with it.

@fluxom_alt I've been trying and having some success but I am only one person.

@cargo The explanation I've heard is that "Max stories" are the tall tales of the wasteland, that grow and change over time.

Show older
Awoo Space

Awoo.space is a Mastodon instance where members can rely on a team of moderators to help resolve conflict, and limits federation with other instances using a specific access list to minimize abuse.

While mature content is allowed here, we strongly believe in being able to choose to engage with content on your own terms, so please make sure to put mature and potentially sensitive content behind the CW feature with enough description that people know what it's about.

Before signing up, please read our community guidelines. While it's a very broad swath of topics it covers, please do your best! We believe that as long as you're putting forth genuine effort to limit harm you might cause – even if you haven't read the document – you'll be okay!