re: mh, complex feels (-)
I've come to realize that I come off as surly and distant because I spend way too much time tending to obligations (house, work, finances), and too little actually having fun or interacting anymore.
I keep justifying this to myself as putting off fun for another day to keep everything stable. But I... don't like constantly being the person that does that.
I guess that also makes it really easy for people to grow distant, too, which makes it hard to break the pattern.
re: mh, complex feels (-)
@Goldkin I relate to this so deeply it hurts. *offers hugs of solidarity*
re: mh, complex feels (-)
@mawr 💖. You are a good person and a good ✨plush✨, Mawr.
re: mh, complex feels (-)
I know I keep saying I'm going to be better at this, that I should try to reach out to people again, and that that keeps kind of falling onto the floor. I guess I've kind of forgotten _how_, for lack of practice and higher levels of anxiety than my baseline in 2014/2015.
I guess the recurring theme is, I really want to stop being the person that holds things together. I really shouldn't have to be, and I really want to just be a person again. Y'know?