Realization from last night;
Despite my worries that people don’t like me, rationally few people dislike me and more people actively like me. You have to really spend time with someone to like or dislike them, so most people will be fairly neutral; their feelings are pretty WYSIWYG, and they move on quickly. You’ll spend enough time to dislike someone only when there’s no real choice; spending time with someone you like helps you like them more.
My worries are probably rooted in childhood where I couldn’t get away from people who hurt me - and everything at least *seemed* really personal, so the idea that I alienate everyone and people hate me is way more past than present.