I came out of this childhood in which nigh constant stress, a lack of independence, and a boatload of negative messages combined to make my brain extremely adept at seizing on anything that might be a cause of anxiety or self hate (and the two wound up being linked a lot).

Obviously jettisoning that is both more enjoyable and more practical, since a lot of the benefits of my old self loathing worldview were being able to sit in place through hours, days of bullshit.

Unfortunately, aging in a time of out of control capitalism and other huge societal threats which aren't easily gauged accurately (somewhere between the official government line of everything being just great as is and complete catastrophe, so it's very 80s) means that while the relative quiet of the 90s and 2000s was a lucky break to start on waaaaay more considerable issues, now is a pretty difficult time to work on either/both.