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Things I learned from “The Northman”;
* armor really doesn’t do you any good, drop yer pants right now
* hallucinogenic mushrooms are all over the place
* so are insane priests of the old man handing out cryptic prophecies

@Leucrotta cryptic prophecies were a dime a dozen in olden times

@wolfteeth Doo doo doot just gonna wander out of the world’s least secure slave quarters and oh hey there’s a creepy old dude, exactly what I was hoping to find!

@Leucrotta found a creepy old dude AND he has the preserved head of the creepy old dude who was my dad's friend. this night keeps getting better!

@wolfteeth I seriously want to go ON about the best part of the movie. It’s like after that part everything was a nice extra. As though they INTENTIONALLY MADE that part for someone formerly 10 years old and reading Conan stories while stuck in rural Georgia with no Internet.

@Leucrotta i am curious about your favorite part! i had kind of mixed feelings about the movie as a whole, there were several rad parts tho

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