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ideation mention, mh - 

Work ended early, which despite my paranoia I am trying to assume means "it's a really slow Monday" rather than "you're a completely inept moron, we want you out." I am having a "high functioning" day so I'm aware things look really bleak despite what might actually be going on, I've been pushing back suicidal ideation all day, and "I have no future and should just do it" is rattling around my head right up there with "should I roast or sautee these squashes as dinner?"

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