Mh- , some journaling
So then my boss did something, I assume unintentionally, that really triggered me. He doesn’t know this and doesn’t need to know this. In the middle of trying to complete a multilayered task i also fielded a more involved phone call, while having my brain scream about how an angry adult or peer was now about to open up on me about how shitty I am. I felt like my ability to respond was really going away with panic about making the adult/peer happy.
I am still on edge.
Mh- , some journaling
However if I know I don’t think as clearly while hypervigilant, and my IQ tested as 149/142 in childhood while I was probably hypervigilant, it’s a safe bet that I’m somewhere smarter than that.