mh journaling
Although I guess a silver lining as well as a down side of all this;
I'm NOT used to stepping back from anger because being angry (without being able to do anything about it) is uncomfortable (rather than because I want to avoid trouble).
Fortunately, I feel like personal growth - I finally have the adult voice I needed in childhood telling me I'm not an out of control monster, that I can actually be at fault in some ways without it being this complete condemnation of character, what's going on really IS upsetting/intended to upset - tells me I am emotionally capable of stepping away from anger, and that I'm worthy of not being enraged if I don't want to be.