super long post. rat hotelier rpg rules 

Here's my silly RPG about playing skaven inn keepers. This is just some nonsense I wrote for a convention game this weekend

the pictures are the formatted version of the rules, I'm going to paste inline after this

Rat Hotelier! (Skaven edition!)
You play a group of skaven who have slayed an innkeeper and secretly taken over his
inn. Keep the inn running, make some cash, and keep your customers from ruining the
good thing you have going here. Or just kill everyone, whatever you’re chaotic stupid
rats.
Rules.
Divide 13 points among these 3 attributes.
RAT! This governs stabbing, gnawing, spreading plague, and other skaven stuff.
Hotelier! Your ability to run an inn. Doing the books, preparing the rooms, cooking, etc.
Disguise! Keeps people from realizing you are a terrible rat person, can also be used for hiding and
lying.
When you make a test you want to roll under your attribute number on d10s determined by the GM.
Normally you roll 2, you may be asked to roll additional dice if you have an advantage of some kind.
Helping people and getting thrown under the bus!
You may give someone else one die to roll at their value if you are in a scene with them, but you will
suffer any ill effects instead of the person who rolled the dice.
ROLLING A 13!
If at any point the total of all the dice you roll on a test equals 13 THE GREAT HORNED
RAT HAS NOTICED YOU! You succeed with the maximum number of dice rolled, but there are magical
and unexpected consequences! (mutation, disease, rolling a different rat type, gaining or losing an item,
sudden appearance of new patrons, whatever just make it weird and bad!)
Getting hit!
All rats, unless otherwise stated can take 3 hits before they die. In general the GM will ask you to
make a rat roll to avoid getting hit. If you do not get the necessary number of successes you are hit.
Rat types! Roll 1d10
1 assassin
you must kill! Any time you attack someone to kill you act before other rats, and count as
having rolled a 1 in addition to your normal die pool
2 servant
your obsequious behavior makes you eager to please, roll 1 extra die on hotelier checks
3 PLAGUE MONK!
Any time you fail a hotelier check, 1 customer gets sick.
4 Rat ogre
You are one big rat! You cannot hide. All disguise checks can only be used to convince
people you are supposed to be there. You may take 6 hits before dying, and roll a minimum of
3 dice on RAT!
5 alchemist
Any check you make involving food drink or chemicals counts successes double. Failures
on the same have dangerous consequences.
6 just a rat
You are not a skaven! You are an intelligent, but otherwise normal rat. You cannot speak,
and are tiny, but no one really suspects you of anything. You may only take 1 hit before
dying
7 Cheerleader!
You have pompoms and a skirt! Gain 1 extra die for disguise!
8 Storm vermin
you wear armor under your disguise, you count as having 1 die that rolled a 1 in addition to
your normal pool to avoid being hit
9 Swarm of rats!
Roll 1d10 to determine number of rats, you have that many HP and may be in that many
places at once. Otherwise as #6
10 WARLOCK
You are in charge. you may use RAT! To cast spells!Starting junk! Roll 2d10 twice
2 warpstone
3 poisoned knife
4 good wine!
5 convincing disguise
6 money (2d10 gold pieces in assorted change)
7 a dwarven helmet complete with beard
8 a wheel of hard cheese
9 a bronze bell
10 a judge’s wig and robe
11 a portrait of sigmar with the eyes cut out
12 a dress or a wizard robe, who can tell the difference
13 IDOL OF THE GREAT HORNED RAAAAAAAT
14 a pet rat
15 3 cat skulls tied to the ends of a whip
16 A maaaaaagic sword
17 mushrooms some magic some normal hard to tell which is which
18 13 bombs
19 a side of beef
20 a human body with strings and sticks tied to the limbs to use as a puppet
Draw one SECRET MOTIVATION CARD! Show the GM DO NOT TELL THE OTHER PLAYERS!
Introduce yourself to the group!
Make the INN!
Give it a name
Decide how many and what kind of rooms it has
Agree on why you took it over in the first place, and what you plan to do with it
Take turns adding buildings to the neighborhood.
Once you’re satisfied with the inn, roll 3 starting customers and begin playing
Customers 2d10 any time you get a new customer
2 Rat Catcher (hit 1 suspicion 3 life 4) if he suspects there are rats he will set traps. You must roll rat
greater than his current suspicion level to avoid them
3 a blood bowl team (hit 3 suspicion 1 life 2) 2d10 members pick a team you think is funny
4 Bob. (if rolled more than once, Jim, mighty zug, kovasi brothers, some other star player) (hit 4,suspicion
1 life 6)
5 goblin ref (hit 1 suspicion 3 life 1)
6 empire soldier (hit 2 suspicion1 life 3)
7 bretonian knight (hit 3 suspicion 2 life 4)
8 kaldor drago (hit 8 suspicion 0 life 8) kaldor drago is more suspicious to everyone than you are, no
one will test to notice you if he is in the scene
9 secret chaos cultist (hit 1 suspicion 3 life 3) will try and out you to distract others from noticing
them
10 barbarian (hit 4 suspicion 1 life 4)
11 merchant (hit 1 suspicion 2 life 2)
12 dwarf slayer (hit 5 suspicion 1 life 4) If the dwarf suspects you there is no way to calm him down
13 orc (hit 4 suspicion 1 life 3) can be convinced easily to attack others who suspect you
14 black orc (hit 5 suspicion 0 life 4) doesn’t suspect just immediately agros everything
15 ogre (hit 5 suspicion 0 life 5) will never figure it out even if someone tells him but may try and squish
you
16 high elf (hit 2 suspicion 4 life 2) will not become suspicion unless you do something to them,
everyone is beneath their notice
17 blood elf (hit 3 suspicion 0 life 2+ kills) will secretly start trying to kill guests
18 demon possessed (roll again on table to see what they possessed if 8, 4or 18, they possess no one
and are just a demon pick one you like they have 4 hits at what ever that kind of demon does)
19 WIZZARD! (hit 3 suspicion 5 life 2) if you great horned rat while dealing with this customer remove
and replace with 1d5 demons)
20 vampire (hit 4 suspicion 5 life 4+feed) the vampire will start feeding on rats and customers deal with
them before they wreck everything
This space left blank for a sick drawing of a ratman

@Momentrabbit

yep!
Those aren't actually my fault, they were a thing in blood bowl.

(they're all man rats in drag, since the women are enormous)

@001zlnv ... w-wait.

Enormous ladyrats?

... you had my interest, now you have my *attention*. O.O

skaven biology is terrible. 

@Momentrabbit

yeah not enormous in the good way. more of the enormous monster that that is constantly giving birth

warhammerfantasy.fandom.com/wi

@JulieSqveakaroo @Momentrabbit

yep! I loved that every team had cheerleaders even the ones who's species don't appear to have women

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