shitpostin, jurassic park
EVERY MORNING I WAKE UP AND OPEN PALM SLAM A VHS INTO THE SLOT. ITS JURASSIC PARK AND RIGHT THEN AND THERE I START DOING THE MOVES ALONGSIDE WITH THE MAIN CHARACTER, VELOCIRAPTOR #2. I DO EVERY MOVE AND I DO EVERY MOVE HARD. MAKIN SCREECHING SOUNDS WHEN I SLAM DOWN SOME SICKLE CLAW ACTION OR EVEN WHEN I MESS UP CHASING A KID. NOT MANY CAN SAY THEY ESCAPED THE RAPTOR PEN. I DID.
Etc, etc.