How to write a resume (CW: sarcastic, grumpy subtooting the whole concept) (redrafted)
"Tell a stranger the best parts of your life story in 1 page. Leave out anything that might make them question your desirability to be allowed to continue surviving in a world you didn't consent to exist in. Do it in a space-wasting format so they can glance at and not actually care about anything you wrote. Include as many keywords so that their black box algorithm will MORE LIKELY add you to the mailing list of candidates that will also be automatically ignored by yet another black box algorithm. Include your email address and phone number so you can not be contacted for the position you actually applied for, but so you can get spam calls and emails from other PII harvesters who will contact you about jobs in other states, that you aren't qualified for, or wouldn't take for any number of reasons, until you die."
Do this until you actually die.
How to write a resume (CW: sarcastic, grumpy subtooting the whole concept) (redrafted)
@kelseyhusky best parts of my life story don't look too much like "work"