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The early night was rough. I'm too quick to read disapproval into thoughtful silence, disappointment into confusion. I feel dependent on tools to weather the worst of the emotional storms, tools which make it harder to write, harder to focus, tools I still can't fully embrace because they make they make it harder to write, harder to focus, harder to be fully me in all the ways I need to be me to be happy being me. I offered a lot of thank-yous last night, and I expressed a lot of gratitude.
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I cannot thank my partners enough for their support, their understanding, their empathy. I love you all so very much, and I can only hope I manage to share with you the same shelter and respite that you offered me last night.
I was told on Saturday to focus my dreams for the next few nights. My nights have been blissfully empty, restful and restorative. The mornings have brought peace and calm, a welcome respite for which I'm thankful. I feel better after each long sleep. I hope it lasts.
