a (semi-sarcastically) dark assessment of my condition
You know what I've felt like lately?
A... a... a PERSON.
I suspect most of you will need no further elaboration.
I miss getting a break from my selfhood now and then. I have never felt more like... some fat Italian dude who does map research for a living and pays his share of the rent and maybe has a small share in a comic.
I can't even get away from it in my dreams anymore. Just... one failed attempt to please someone after another.
a (semi-sarcastically) dark assessment of my condition
@zebratron2084 'human with a cookie' is definitely LESS good than 'crow with a fresh carcass,' but I'd say they're about comparable on-balance. still thinkin' of ya, sis; sorry the braingunk is treating you rough.
a (semi-sarcastically) dark assessment of my condition
@hystericempress *hugs* It's ok. At the very least, I have had some minor reasons to hope Tiny Lost Kitten Friend is OK out there, and something is happening in a couple of days that might give me a shot at finding a local dealer, which might end up unclogging my mana tubes real good...
Sis?
Sobriety is WEIRD. Don't ever try it. :O
a (semi-sarcastically) dark assessment of my condition
@zebratron2084 Oh, hon. I've been sober for the last year and a half. I discovered that weed doesn't actually HELP with my anxiety, so much as 'now I'm high AND I'm anxious AND I'm hyperfocusing and couchlocked about the thing I'm anxious about.'
a (semi-sarcastically) dark assessment of my condition
@hystericempress Oh! I'm actually kinda happy to hear that, if it's working for you!
Seattle and NOLA have definitely taught me that weed should be a Sometimes Food. I had hit a REAL bad law of diminishing returned with it, and while I look forward to having it back in my life...
I needed that six-month tolerance break real, real, real, real bad. It's maybe TOO easy to get in Seattle...
a (semi-sarcastically) dark assessment of my condition
@zebratron2084 Like, I'm still on nicotine and alcohol, albeit 'infrequently' for both. Which, paradoxically, both seem to treat my brain better. The stuff I REALLY miss are shrooms and LSD...
a (semi-sarcastically) dark assessment of my condition
@hystericempress Yeah, same here...
a (semi-sarcastically) dark assessment of my condition
@zebratron2084 Fuckin' just...
Goddamn all my sympathies on this point.
I have been trapped in this state for years and I don't wish it on anyone. Sorry you are feeling this way.
a (semi-sarcastically) dark assessment of my condition
But at least I have one glimmer of hope:
Sometime, when I least expect it... maybe even today... I will be a human with A COOKIE. And that's not great, but it's pretty good.
Come on, I'm trying to be positive here, people. :)