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more mood stuff, cat-adjacent, mortality, love, etc (~) 

also idk if it's all the MAMA CAT HORMONES in the air or just 2020 but i've been on the verge of tears a lot lately.

not even sad tears, or at least not short-term sad tears

i think just dealing with all the enormity of COVID while the Great Cycle Of Life (hopefully only the Birth and Living parts) is actually happening right in our living room is opening all the blast doors to the parts of my brain where the POIGNANT STUFF is stored.

been thinking a lot about peggy, and you guys, and how little time any of us might have left, and just... yeah. i've had a real good life but i have done the EXACT OPPOSITE of my plan A after getting kicked out of seattle by just forming more and more bonds with more and more vulnerable creatures who can hurt me someday by ceasing to exist

it's that kind of crying fit that comes from too much love coming and going out of the system, and not nearly enough sense of safety and security

i love you fuckers all so much and i hope if anything ever happens to me you will remember me fondly and tell really dirty snarky stories about my exploits. i swear i will do no less for any of you but you fuckers all had better live to at least 70 ok.

re: more mood stuff, cat-adjacent, mortality, love, etc (~) 

yeah there go the tiger tears

it's never pretty to see a grown monster cry

people have drowned from manticore sadness you know, we fill whole rivers

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