Safe space talk
So... Safe spaces. This sort of thing has been on my mind for a long time. I remember an experience I had around a year ago with a chat server that ended up being a very bad fit for me. This server was protecting extremely vulnerable, harmed people. There were triggers relating to affection and love that needed to be carefully handled.
Safe space talk
When you enter another community, you respect their rules. You live by their rules. And if you need a community that is more fitting to your needs, you either find those who's rules fit your needs, or you make your own. And that brings me to Discord and Mastadon. Both of them are based around the idea of making your own spaces. Perhaps their initial intention was simply decentralization to avoid corporations, but they can be more.
Safe space talk
We have this unique ability to create powerful, interesting, open spaces that are moderated the way we choose. We can make the communities we always wanted, and create our own rules. This isn't the first time it's happened ever, but on the scale we're now seeing it, with the power and ease of use of the tools we have available, it's amazing.
Safe space talk
It reminds me how much I would appreciate a 'public on this instance' privacy type for posts. But that's a bit of a tangent. Point is, I am happy with the directions we're moving, towards both ease of accessibility AND smaller scale moderation mingling with larger scale projects. I want to see places like this thrive, and see the communities that spawn bevcause of it. We all have different needs, I hope that we can all meet them.
Safe space talk
This kinda got away from me, and I'm not sure I have a point so much as that I want to just put my feelings and thoughts to words. I'm just one weird person in this world, but I've found other weird people that make this life worth something to me. Make me feel not alone. And I want everyone to have that, I want us all to find that community we belong in.
Safe space talk
@BigFatFae tbh I would use the shine off a "public on this instance" privacy setting...
Safe space talk
@green Seriously, I would love it to death. It would drastically help for expression of kink-stuff, too, because you could still have a 'public posts must be CW' in your CoC, but local posts could be as expressive as you wanted. Good for people who struggle with feeling valid in their expressions! It'd let more nuanced communities form, centered around different protections
Safe space talk
@BigFatFae conflicting access-needs are a big thing in leftist, social justice, mental health, and abuse/trauma survivor spaces- i really wish people would recognize this more, i see folks getting attacked sometimes b/c they have perfectly valid needs that have the misfortune of clashing w/ someone else's perfectly valid needs. i agree with you: decentralized separate-but-collaborative communities like masto or discord are great for handling this type of thing!
Safe space talk
@nventous I wish I could favorite this more than once <3
Safe space talk
How does someone affection starved thrive in that environment? The short answer is that they don't. If you are a person who is in need of reaffirmation and care and affection surrounded by hurt people who need space away from the more overt examples of such, your needs and their needs clash. Does that mean one group is being unreasonable? I don't believe so in the least. Both of you are in need of something. This is the value of different communities.