seriously how do people have energy for things
-F
severe executive function(?) difficulties
we're only barely able to keep on top of laundry enough to have something to wear each day
many days we can't even manage to take a proper shower
vacuuming is a once in a blue moon thing
we can't even use non-paper dishes because they'll end up in the sink for ages and then get thrown out when they go moldy because mysophobia means that moldy things, even after being cleaned of mold, aren't usable to us
we just
can't keep on like this
-F
we've been wondeirng the same thing ourselves the past few weeks. extremely no energy msot of the time :(
@Felthry the answer is probably related to being nt
re: asking for help re: severe executive function(?) difficulties
@Felthry *offer hugs*
it sounds like y'all're really overwhelmed and it's really hard
when did y'all start the job? is it possible to take a week off? it really feels like y'all're having a bad time, especially lately
- 🎒💧
re: asking for help re: severe executive function(?) difficulties
@packbat we started a little over a year ago, and are currently in the negative on accumulated time off due to taking a week off about two months ago that didn't really help at all
-F
re: asking for help re: severe executive function(?) difficulties
@Felthry *nods*
*hugs?*
do y'all have the income to, like, pay for laundry service or maid service? take some things off y'all's plate?
- 🎒 💧
(also using disposable plates for executive function purposes is super valid - we're glad y'all're doing the thing that helps y'all)
re: asking for help re: severe executive function(?) difficulties
@packbat yeah we're trying to set that up and have been for months--sending emails and scheduling things is one of those things that requires a lot of Effort that we really can't spare
we have an initial visit this thursday though
-F
re: asking for help re: severe executive function(?) difficulties
@Felthry 🌟
good to hear that y'all're making progress on something hard that'll help y'all
continued sympathies on the struggles
- 🎒
severe executive function(?) difficulties
i know you worry about losing the job and understand that fear but you can't keep pushign yourselves like this. you really need to ask for a shortened schedule before you burn out completely -s4
severe executive function(?) difficulties
we're extremely worried about you b/c it feels like you're pushing yourself to the breaking point for fear of changing anything or not doing "enough"
severe executive function(?) difficulties
@nautilee @Felthry I'm also extremely worried. You don't sound overwhelmed to me, you sound burned out but not aware of it.
I'm glad you're trying to hire people to handle some chores. I believe you do need time to yourself, and time to do nourishing things, and the sooner the better.
Like, I believe if you have sick time, or vacation time, you should take it *now*.
re: severe executive function(?) difficulties
@Austin_Dern @nautilee unfortunately we are in the negative on vacation time after taking a week off like two months ago for this exact problem, which didn't seem to help any
-F
re: severe executive function(?) difficulties
@Austin_Dern @nautilee we have some sick time but like... we're not sick? i don't think we're allowed to use it when we're not sick
-F
re: severe executive function(?) difficulties
Because temporary time off doesn't solve the underlying issue, that you're just flat out working too much.
re: severe executive function(?) difficulties
@nautilee @Felthry @Austin_Dern
This, especially. It might qualify for short-term disability or a sabbatical at this point.
re: severe executive function(?) difficulties
@nautilee @Felthry @Austin_Dern
Everything about this is telltale autistic burnout, too.
re: severe executive function(?) difficulties
@Felthry @nautilee I'm afraid I don't understand 'negative' here; do you mean you had (say) three vacation days and used five, or do you mean the boss has warned they'll give no more time off for the near future?
I would think seriously about taking even unpaid time off now, though, because what you describe seems to me unsustainable.
re: severe executive function(?) difficulties
@Austin_Dern @nautilee the former, we had three days off and took five (the numbers are probably different i don't remember)
-F
re: severe executive function(?) difficulties
@Austin_Dern @nautilee i don't know if unpaid time off is a thing we can do
-F
re: severe executive function(?) difficulties
re: severe executive function(?) difficulties
@Austin_Dern @nautilee the problem is that for us, *being present at work and expected to do work* is too much pressure, at least for that length of time
i don't know if anything short of a shorter work week would help
-F
re: severe executive function(?) difficulties
severe executive function(?) difficulties
@Felthry the traditional method to handling this was to have an X hour workweek, and a stay-at-home wife to manage all the house chores and also manage the social lives of both partners. There's a lot of stuff in society that only works when there's plenty of unpaid labor propping it up, and falls apart otherwise.
we took out... half the garbage
it took us the entire four-day weekend to gather up enough energy to do that
how the fuck do people do this regularly while alos having a 40-hour work week
-F