substance use (-)
I’ve stopped using cannabis because I thought it was having more negative effects on me than positive effects. Either it was stabilizing mood more than I thought or I’m having much worse withdrawal than would be expected for my usage rate. Either it wasn’t causing the headaches I was accusing it of or I’m having them anyway as a withdrawal side effect.
But I’m way more focused, productive, alert, and able to work without it. I am also impatient and grumpy, which isn’t new.
substance use (-)
I’m one week into not using THC (after using it every other day for a year and a half), so I should almost certainly wait three more weeks before making any decisions to untangle withdrawal effects from baseline things that it was correcting. I hate giving up any of my intelligence and ability to work so, despite its euphoric nature, I’d like to stay off this drug. I don’t want to be trapped in parts of the world relatively friendly to it. But I don’t know if my baseline is okay
substance use (-)
So it’s a hard call. I don’t know what option forces me to give up more- the drug that robs me of every other evening and reduces my intelligence at all times, or the mental illness that bites and harms and attacks me and tells me I shouldn’t try.
But the drug does too. It makes me feel okay with sitting around and not doing anything to improve my life or state of being; as long as I keep using “I’m not okay” as a reason to go do something, I’m moving forward more without it.
substance use (-)
I think I am at this point moderately less comfortable with cannabis use by my friends than I was before I tried it, and I’m not happy about holding that view.