mh day job stuff
So “the adults are nowhere to be found when I need help but they’re right there when I make a mistake or they’re assigning work” is a huge button from my childhood, which wasn’t being stomped on *before* my boss very abruptly started working from home (3 hours drive away). This stacked with other sources of stress (I hate answering phone calls; our database can be finicky right when I need to generate paperwork; I physically move 1-60 lb boxes etc) and
mh day job stuff
other triggers (adults assume I can handle whatever volume or complexity of work they want me to do, assumption I will stay after school/work, assumption I will show up on a daily basis where I already feel trapped and stuck) to make me miserable- and more likely to go with old assumptions (ie any mistake could be cause for the adults to go off about how innately stupid I am, everyone else gets an exciting and valued life while I’m doing shit).
mh day job stuff
I am trying to set all this to the side because life here and now is uncomfortable enough on its own, but this is hard.