sometimes—often when I’m tired, stressed, or overwhelmed—I wind up wanting to be around friends, but with absolutely zero expectation that I will participate in conversation in any way; this isn’t just a “feeling nonverbal” thing, trying to understand speech seems stressful and exhausting sometimes. it goes beyond speech; I want to be *around* but not interactive, present and often touch-seeking or outright cuddly but not expected to comprehend or emit anything but the most basic communication. like, maybe about the level of social engagement you expect from your housecat, or perhaps substantially less.

this is not especially infrequent for me tbh. it sounds like it’s probably An Autism Thing. it’s definitely one of the many interlocking parts of the “huggable plastic inflatable toy dragon that is definitely an object and not a person” thing.

@kistaro this makes sense; I get a similar though maybe not identical thing a lot, present and nonverbal, especially kinetic. This comes out a lot with hiking, where I get to be with people and moving, or being the person drawing. My ex thought my habit of drawing in coffee shops where I was around people but not talking, was actually being extroverted!