The Mummy Returns, commentary
SOMETIME IN THE LATE 1990s
"okay, so the first movie had a half-decayed priest returned as a nearly unstoppable death machine wielding potent magics. What'll get people into theaters for 'Mummy II'?"
"what if we explore our heroes mythic origins?"
"eh."
"what if they're a heartwarming family who adventures together?"
"family friendly. Sure."
"what if you had smokingly hot people of EVERY POSSIBLE GENDER?"
"hm."
"kids like steampunk and undead pygmies?"
"okay..."
"what if you had an UNDEAD ARMY OF ANTHRO JACKALS as an excuse to do a Lawrence of Arabia fight?"
*slams the YES rubber stamp down on proposal*