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Rationally, I know that a lot of different triggers got pulled and between ADHD and past trauma, the intensity on those triggers is cranked all the way up. IRrationally I feel like the worst shit in the world and my failure to kill myself is further proof of how fucking villainous and worthless I am.

I just have to hope that eventually my rational knowledge will become my emotional knowledge, on days like this.

@Leucrotta Hey. Stick around, buddy. As long as you wake up on a morning, you haven't failed the day.

@Cheff even worse, I ALSO carry around the irrational believe that if I were to kill myself, I'd be further doing harm because I'm villainous and worthless. So I'm sticking around tho sadly sometimes it's for the wrong reasons.

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