-> @oneironott@vulpine.club @Oneironott@awoo.space
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Species: Neoprene Otter (Otterprene)
Gender: Modular/Toy
Pronouns: ve/ver or they/them
Location: Halcyon <-> Seattle
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Vloelei Saleizhu [ID: HLY-2756-β]
Dreamer of many dreams and realities
Software Developer, Writer, Music Mixer and Producer, Leftist, proponent of morphological freedom, extremely otherkin and plural, and as positive as I can be.
Headmates with @Silverwing
Joined Apr 2017
a toke tonight for all those not from this earth, but stuck here the same.
Anyway heres to what is likely to be another spoonless day letting down folks that want to see me because I can’t handle seeing folks right now
Yaaay.
mh(-)
Had a wonderful night
But had a series of nightmares that drained and shook me. Harassment and yelling and death threats being chided that the reason i swing back into “boy mode” is because the stress of being a visibly trans woman is too much for me to handle
And i’m not even sure that dream was wrong. I MISSED that comfort and i feel guilty for sinking back into that privilege but sometimes it’s just too much.
empowering realizations
I have done a better job of taking care of myself than my parents ever have.
death
You know, when i do pass from this place, hopefully a long while from now… well…
It is my belief that sometime after my death, one way or another, I will find my way Home. So… imagine me swimming in Halcyon’s waters, and know that you’ll always be welcome to come by when we can meet again :)
I know it’s… not the best topic and should probably write up some things regarding Death and idk why i’m thinking of it now but…
It always made more sense to me that death be a celebration.Good feelings
Song of the night (and many nights): Orbital - Halcyon (and on and on) https://youtu.be/bV-hSgL1R74
Oh sweet Halcyon
Sweetly glowing blue
Dive deep in warm waters
Home with kith and peace
The McElmore Brothers
Screamin bout toys
postfurry, the power of language and perception
Which, i think that has always been a goal for me. To be able to speak of both worlds with equal impact and significance. To elevate what we dream of doing and being, and to feel it blend into my life with a seamless beauty
postfurry, the power of language and perception
I had a moment with Em the other day where we just… slipped into talking of this scene we’ve been building for a while, and what would have felt like “role-playing IRL” if it wasn’t just… us. But it felt right, considering how our folk tend to view the paracosm. To speak of That Stuff as if it was anything else we would do feels… empowering and right, and for at least a few moments i feel like the wonderful balance between worlds that i am.
fantasies, identity-loss, transformation
The truth is, i still fantasize about such a scenario. Others as well, like being absorbed into a whole greater than me.
I’ve always been ashamed of fantasizing so much about such a thing, and romanticizing such sort of death despite still having wonderful things in my life.
Some nights… what i would give to be able to wake up like all of this was all a dream, and would fade fast as a dream and replaced with a better reality than this.
fantasies, identity-loss, transformation, sui mention
This was mostly the form in which i fantasized regularly about “death” back during my traumatic period. I fantasized about that process of forgetting my parents, my family, my friends. Everyone that had abandoned me and everyone that had hurt me. Some spiritual, ritual experience of my identity and everything that i was… fading away. All that pain…
And to just open my eyes again, refreshed. Right. With no memory of it ever being wrong.
fantasies, identity-loss, transformation
I have fantasies about getting the opportunity to go Home, and to be Myself finally, in body and soul. However, in such scenarios, becoming myself in mind involves… forgetting.
Forgetting that i was ever human
Forgetting all about this life, it’s details… to be remade, a fresh slate. Untainted by abuse, trauma… but also forgetting the good things
fantasies, identity-loss, transformation
There are a few fantasies i have in which i am admittedly… embarrassed of and reluctant to talk about a lot of times. A lot of these revolve around death, or reminiscent/equivalence of.
One of these is the topic of identity loss that sometimes comes with hypnotic/transformation scenarios. The concept that… sure, you might get what you want but you will forget that you ever wanted it.
plush blob
plob.
gender, lewd, inflation kink
Ve's still such a twinky fem boy, even when the thumping of that bass gives ver huge boy boobs bouncing with the beat~
and no one objects to hearing vis moans of ecstasy amidst that big drop, or the loud BANG of that stretchy hide separating dramatically.
By the transition to the next song, ve is back, uploaded and instantiated again out on the dancefloor, oh-so giddy to burst
gender, lewd, inflation kink
current gender: twinky pooltoy boi vloe with a crop top showing vis belly valve and a flagged tail flaunting those lusciously large rumpcheeks and thick tail.
Ve's at a kinky club wearing a unique plug in vis tailend that analyzes the beat and internal pressure and sends small puffs of air into ver along with the bass n.n'
ve isn't afraid to let others use vis cunt in the middle of the dancefloor either. Ve IS, after all, the club's pleasuretoy poolboi~
---
Species: Neoprene Otter (Otterprene)
Gender: Modular/Toy
Pronouns: ve/ver or they/them
Location: Halcyon <-> Seattle
---
Vloelei Saleizhu [ID: HLY-2756-β]
Dreamer of many dreams and realities
Software Developer, Writer, Music Mixer and Producer, Leftist, proponent of morphological freedom, extremely otherkin and plural, and as positive as I can be.
Headmates with @Silverwing
Joined Apr 2017
