Sigh, I'm in bed and my mind is drifting off to horny thoughts again and every time I try to relax and fight it I just feel nauseous

Why can't I just clear my mind and relax. WHY CANT I JUST FUCJING RELAX

There so many things in life I worry about, I worry a lot, worrying causes anxiety, anxiety causes nausea, I could throw up any minute if I had no self control at all

I wonder if something like hypnosis would work? It's not the same thing but I'm definitely going to try meditation when I'm back at my uni accommodation

Breathing slowly, loudly and focusing my mind on the sound of myself breathing helps a lot, but this really isn't a way for me to cope

I guess masturbating is a coping mechanism for myself, but it really shouldn't be.. I hate masturbating, I shouldn't have to masturbate to relax, it encourages far worse behaviours from myself because I end up jerking off over some really obscure shit and feel terrible about it after I'm done. Just to re-assure you it's nothing illegal, just stuff I should be respecting, not jerking offf over. Pornsites and slursville, stuff I hate. I don't know how it happens

The only way I can fix this is if I can fight my anxiety. I have a year left of uni and time by myself, I need to take advantage of this time and see a doctor.