So last night I had the by-now annual tradition of falling into a pitch black mood, thanks to the way things work for me around this time of year.

There's a lot that is difficult about this time of year; the cold, the terrible roads, the sun setting at 4:20 in the afternoon. But what gives it that extra little kick is the Christmas season, where I'm told I need to get into the Christmas spirit. I need to be jolly and joyous.

And what inevitable happens is, I can't. I fall short. And when that happens, I feel like I have failed, that either I have failed to let the spirit of Christmas into myself, or the Christmas spirit took one look at me and gave up. And so, failing to meet the social pressure (and it IS pressure) to be in a joyful mood leaves me feeling like a failure, which inevitably turns a bad mood worse.

I'm better now. I'm no danger to myself and others. But this season is always hard.

I don't wish any ill will on people who are big on the Christmas spirit (though I wish they'd keep it in the month of December and honor the Halloweentown Accords.) But I wish there was a little more social acknowledgement of how the pressure to be happy can lead to people feeling worse.