Emotional instability (-)
Anyone else afraid of their own emotions? Because I sure am not.
Jokes aside though, I am the fuck scared of my own emotions, because it means losing control and control is the only thing I have left.
I did bad things when I let my emotions run free. I hurt people, I did stuff I regretted.
Suicidal thoughts creep in when I get emotional.
I don't like any of those, at all.
I just want to be good, but maybe the real me can't? I don't know.
Emotional instability (-)
I'm scared of my anger. And that I make others afraid with it.
I'm afraid of my fear, and especially my depression. They lead me down dark paths. My self-doubt and self-hate.
You are good, I genuinely believe that. You don't like hurting anyone, and I've never seen you act maliciously or with ill intent. I've never even seen you hurt anyone, myself.
Emotional instability (-)
@ulvra @Ulfra_Wolfe Anger is useful for me in certain situations.
It allows me to detach from people, I shouldn't be attached to.
Fear is important too, because it is what keeps me alive in bad situations. I'm afraid to die and cause harm to people around me, that depend on me.
Both are valid emotions to be afraid of though. So you're OK hun.
I don't even know what emotions I'm afraid of, I just know I lose control if I let them go and that scares me most.
Emotional instability (-)
@maxinered @Ulfra_Wolfe Definitely, all emotions are valid and have importance, the trouble is when they go unchecked, which is especially a risk with the negative ones as they will control you if you don't control them.
Still, I do not want anger, not anymore. Sure it can serve a purpose, but I am personally better off without it.
Emotional instability (-)
@Ulfra_Wolfe @maxinered Anger is a poison. I was angry when I was younger, fueled by self loathing, but when I started HRT I decided "no more" and since then I haven't been angry even once.
For me I think my main concern is losing the losing the good emotions that took me so long to find, and to lose my ability to trust.