mh, very -, mostly getting it out of my head 

Things keep changing. Patterns keep getting disrupted. World is on fire. Friends are acting irrationally about stupid shit and some are believing disinfo.

I am having trouble coping or managing, I am finding myself starting to spiral back into 2018 levels of anxiety like tonight.

I'm afraid of losing my relationship, my fiance, my life, my friends to viruses or police/military. Of losing everything. I don't know why. I don't know if its rational. I am having trouble believing when people tell me 'it will all be okay and everything is fine'.

I can just try to ignore it and hope they are right. I am scared, more so than I ever have been.

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