Otherkin, Longing, Rambling, Dreams
A dream last night left me with an extreme sense of longing and sadness due to the intensity of it, primarily in the shape of desiring my old body, or an approximation of it.
The dream itself was pretty mundane, it was simply me exploring my old home from last life. Everything was about where it should be from the oldest memories I have of it. Cool walls, a pool to get in and out of the little enclosed area, jars, a cool breeze. A gentle rain was coming through the 'window' of rocks, tapping along the floor and flowing out. A foggy view of the ocean beyond, with storms gathering in the distance, not unusual for the area. Everything had a smell, a texture, a sensation, to every touch. Even the light breeze against my earfins and wings. Everything had more intense colors, with some I'm not sure how to describe, similar to how I remember being able to see before. So much detail and stuff to unpack from that dream...
It made me realize how much I just miss certain things, even aspects of my old life. My body especially... and really hit the 'species dysphoria' button pretty hard, heh.
And I miss my old home. And I wish I could maybe one day reconstruct it here, even if it wouldn't be quite the same.