fluffy 💜 ✪▾̫✪ @fluffy@awoo.space

I’m kind of afraid to get dressed.

Also sorry to Fiona for having to launch her into space by standing up so quickly

Also thank you apple for making iPhones easily washable

Also I guess my floor was due for a mopping anyway

Today is one of those days that started out with me wishing I could poop, then quickly turned to me wishing I could stop pooping.

Shout-out to my colon for making the 15 feet between my desk and my toilet an impossibly long marathon.

Home automation is addictive. https://youtu.be/GEzecPefWDE

iRobot claims to care about robots, but yet they wouldn't let their own products register for support. Hypocrites.

it's like i was inside the music

Oops for got to attach

The thing

Nothing like playing DDR while high as fuck on a gigantic TV that fills my entire field of view and earning my first S+ ever

Nihilism is easy when you realize there’s nothing involved

maintenant? more like mainte-not, am i right

Modern life is: trying to figure out what weird random thing is connected to a specific wifi access point, turns out it's my fucking water heater

Werner, on the other hand, did way better, and he even enjoyed being introduced to one of my neighbors and didn't freak out at all! He's gotten really mellow in his old age.

The tragedy of the billionaire Frenchman allergic to eggs: he can never have un oeuf

footage of the incident

So for a couple of years, Werner’s been having issues with the litter box; namely he’ll get into the box and then pee, then he thinks he’s done and starts to leave, then the poop starts coming out, leaving a trail from the litter box to wherever he’s going. Depending on how constipated he is the radius of impact can vary quite widely; sometimes he makes it all the way into my living room before it comes out.

In the new house I have a clear line of sight to the litter box from my desk and fairly often I can see when he’s doing this. When the poop starts to actually come out he pauses and clenches (quite comically) and if I see him do this while leaving the box I can rush over and either try to hold him in the box, or hold the litter scoop under his butt until he finishes, at which point he relaxes and runs on his happy little way.

Unfortunately, lately he’s gotten wise to this utter indignity, and he’ll make a token effort to push out a turd or two while I’m trying to keep him in place, then he relaxes and runs off... under a couch or my bed, where he finishes pooping.

Fiona's been especially frustrating about wanting to go outside despite having been an indoor cat for the last 9 years, so today I finally found her leash and harness and put it on her. She was so excited to go outside! Then she took two steps out the door, then a car drove by and she was NNNOOOOOOPE.