consent
And really? If you, reading this, think you're 100% perfect at handling consent, that you're guaranteed never do something a partner is uncomfortable with, *you're probably wrong*. Thinking you can't fuck up is a dangerous complacency.
consent
It's way too easy for a person to be able to say "I asked and they said yes, so there can't be a problem."
Or even "...and if they say there's a problem, they're lying."
consent
Honestly starting to think that rigid emphasis on the letter of consent can be a way of /hiding/ nasty patterns, both on an individual and subcultural level.
consent
A lot of people say that consent is really simple; yes means yes and no means no and as long as you communicate clearly everything is fine.
That's a dangerous oversimplification. It's not *wrong*, but it ignores a whole heap of nasty and subtle failure modes. The degree to which our culture ignores consent can take a lot of unlearning, and to say that it's simple makes it easy to gloss over dangerous underwater currents that can sweep away the unwary.
@mawr the naming scheme for the series is almost designed to be confusing.
....I just now realized I got the reading order wrong by reading Four Roads Cross before Last First Snow. Dammit :(
Y'know how I won't shut up about people making assumptions about users' internet speed?
Birdsite now refuses to load in-browser on my phone (the mobile site) because it takes more than 1500ms to finish rendering, and instead just tells me "Birdsite is taking too long to load".
BIRDSITE: "Fuck you, all rural/non-US users!"
(I confess, a lot of the time I can still be pretty dismissive, but I'm trying to fight that impulse.)
Moving to @starkatt
I'm a leftist trans gay fox girl. More than one thing can be true at a time. I believe in agency, subjectivity, and beauty.
In my day job, I'm an apprentice electrician.
Please introduce yourself when sending a follow request if we haven't recently chatted. Interacting with me is encouraged even if I don't follow back. I'm here to get to know people, not be a fountain of Content.
🕯️