wolfe but sad @wolfgang@awoo.space

filled with envy and despair

update since i've been away from here for a while:

i wanna die and everything i do is at best only a distraction from wanting to not live anymore

she's such a bullshit-spewing charlatan on the one hand - but her diet+pills actually work for me, and my stomach hasn't been this neutral/ok/calm since like 2013

anyway i don't have time to spiral today; i have a million things i need to do

i hate apologies. not necessarily apologizing myself, but mostly other people apologizing to me.

like, what's the point? you've already hurt me. don't tell me you're sorry. tell me how you're planning to not do it again. or maybe just gtfo of my life. hurting me again and again isn't going to be ok just cause you've apologized

re: no one cares, i was texting with a friend about how i think we're attracted to completely different sets of guys and as a counterexample, he brought up this friend with benefits -_- yay thanks for reminding me of him -_-

(oh but it's okay!!! cause he said sorry for bringing it up!!!! so it's fine now and i'm not spiraling into self hatred!!!!!!!!! wait no i still am)

sounds like my neighbors had a little mix up between their shofar and their didjeridoo

sad and worried

sad wolfdog time

also she is a grade a charlatan. told me not to get my covid vaccine booster shot (which i went and got anyway) -- because she claims it might cause my autoimmune issues to worsen "and then it'll be really difficult to get you out of it! but if you get covid? i can get you out of that really easily!" actual quote.

she literally claimed she can cure covid using herbs and diet. covid. a disease that humanity has known for less than two years. but she already knows what the cure is. yeah. right. 🙄🙄🙄

i've been on her weird diet for two weeks, and been taking her weird pills and weird potion thing for one week, and so far there's no noticeable difference

if there's no improvement by the next time i see her (at the end of the month), i'll probably cancel the appointment so i don't have to keep paying for something that doesn't work

i am Lonely and Depressed and my roommate is with their family and my only other physical-space friend is otherwise busy

basically i wanna go back to sleep but i have one (1) appointment this afternoon and sleeping now will disrupt my ability to get there

energy levels today: -5

hearing ambulance sirens and resisting the urge to howl along