wolfe but sad @wolfgang@awoo.space

oh boy this evening's emotional roller coaster is brought to you by: impulse buying another night at the furry con hotel then getting an error from the amtrak website when trying to change my train

so uhhhh i just bought train tickets and made a hotel reservation for going to a furry con while i'm in the us 😳😳😳

today started with a huge todo list and a massive panic attack all throughout doing the todos; but that slowly subsided(?) during the evening and i managed to enjoy(?!?!) the crowded streets(?!?!?!?!) and ate a tasty food and watched all the becostumed tel avivis celebrating the (costume related) holiday

------------------------------------->
you must be this cool
to work at the hipster
burger place

i might be irreparably broken, but i could at least try to do a better job of recognizing the limitations that it creates and avoiding things that are outside of them

it is a new day and i wish i was dead

currently regretting: everything

irreparable as usual

tried going to sit in the library but i freaked out from... *checks notes* the thought of being in a room with 5-10 other people

i have booked a flight ticket to chicago and back

i never want to get out of the hotel bed, but in a very different way than how i don't want to get out of my home bed

better yet how do i communicate this to all of my friends 🙃🤪🤡🤠

how do i communicate to a friend that they talk too much and i feel stifled(?) because i can't talk as much as i want to

feeling bad for being complicit in something beyond my control is unproductive, but that doesn't mean i can stop doing it; just means i can feel DOUBLE bad, for being complicit AND for allowing myself to think all these negative thoughts 😎😎😎😎

the hotel is very nice; i am feeling very guilty and financially irresponsible; and irreparably broken; and i wish i was dead instead

current mental state: had to check in to a hotel to be able to take a shower

doing financially stupid things in the hopes that it makes me feel less shit 👍👍👍👍👍

there is a non zero chance that i will be flying to america (and back) this month and possibly attending a furry con

irreparably broken as per usual

also yet another reason to not eat ✨