I'm starting to wonder if I'm not so much a woman the same way my transgender friends are women, so much as I'm a woman in much the way a cat raised entirely around dogs is a dog.

And you know what? That's fine. Far as I'm concerned, that cat IS a dog. That definition might not hold water to a taxonomist or a veterinarian, and sure, there's a time the category just doesn't apply. But yeah, socially? I would gladly play fetch with that Good Dog all day long and not presume them to do Cat Things.

I guess what I'm saying is, I've always gotten along better with women and feminine men, and I tend to instinctively include myself when I'm doing things like deciding who to root for, or who I want to spend my time with. I have nothing against masculine guys, if they're verifiably _nice_, but the comfort and sense of belonging aren't really there. I don't speak their language or culture at all.

I don't know if that means I'm trans, but it means I'm something. I keep fearing that I'll get fit into some bed of Procrustes, where I have to be either Trans or Not Trans instead of... just what I am. I don't think that purge would ever come from _you_ folks, but... I dunno, I guess it just feels good to make the affirmation sometimes?

I'm okay with my body. I guess that's part of why it was important for me to make this stoned rant, too: I wanted to reassure any of you who have worried about my gender issues that I am basically OKAY. :D I'm actually pretty comfortable having a go at presenting male.

I don't really have much urge to change my body or genital configuration or mode of dress, though. I never have, and I've always felt that kinda separates me from my trans friends. And if you ever feel you have to redefine me out of the "trans" category as a matter of honesty or cultural self-defense, I am genuinely okay with it... as long as I can still caucus with you and come to your parties. <3