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PEGGY, A NATIVE: "It's Mardi Gras! You've got to try to catch some throws from the parade floats! Get you some beads and stuff! Get into the spirit!"

ME, A MIDWESTERNER:

PEGGY, AFTER PREVIOUS EXCHANGE: "Come on, you gotta get your hands up! Get ready for some throws! It's what we're all here for! It's fun!"

ME, AFTER BEING BEANED IN THE HEAD *TWICE* BY THESE FUCKING SWAMP MANIACS HURLING THINGS INTO THE CROWD:

@zebratron2084
"Protective clothing"
Say something with 3+ inches of inflatable padding 😋

Alternatively, DODGEBALL!

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