A funny urban magick witchy punk concept I just thought of:

crystal healing, only instead of choosing extremely specific varieties of minerals for one's intent... choose different kinds of plastics.

"I'm feeling burned out and stressed due to money worries. Which plastic healer helps with that?"

"Polypropelene is resistant to stress, so meditate with, like, an empty yogurt cup you find lying on the sidewalk."

Tentative examples of some possible plastic associations:

* celluloid - fire, fame, movie-making, YouTube celebrities, Mercury and Mars
* casein - motherhood, cats, nurturing qualities, cooking, allergies, Venus and Ceres
* platinum silicone - recovery from surgery, skin, sexuality, wealth, online ad revenue, Jupiter
* polyester - fashion, beauty, creation, fiber arts, amigurumi, Venus and Eris

I was thinking of this as a joke, but... magical practice is kind of like that, anyway. Some plastics have a crystalline chemical structure, and crystalline structure is supposed to be metaphysically significant, so they may as well be just as legit as healing crystals. That is, unless if you rule them out just for being made by humans. However, that's similar to the debate about the metaphysical properties of natural citrine vs. heat-treated citrine.

I like witchcraft traditions that use everyday objects as foci for intent: handkerchiefs, kitchen herbs, brooms, candles, and string. However, I'm creeped out by how easily New Age bu$iness would turn this idea into a money-maker where gentrified malls have boutiques full of random plastic items priced at hundreds of times their normal market value, telling people to treat their cancer symptoms with $500 Bakelite orgone pyramids and $200 sporks labeled as Atlantean triune power wands.