mutuals: reply to this post and I will reply to you with a Battlemech from FASA's venerable Battletech(tm)/Mechwarrior(tm) setting that I think you would enjoy piloting
@hystericempress I WANNA PILOT A 40' CRAYFISH MADE OF DISCARDED OFFICE SUPPLIES 
@hystericempress *studies it for a few minutes. nods thoughtfully, scratches some preliminaries into some tree bark, and starts hoarding binder clips, threepenny nails, tire scraps, and wads of bubblegum* Thank you! I'll let you know how it goes!
@zebratron2084 Also: it is very telling about Battletech as a setting that '40-foot tall crayfish made of discarded office supplies' is an -accurate- description of at least a dozen mechs, to the point I had slight trouble settling on WHICH 40-foot tall crayfish to give you
@zebratron2084 The KGC-0000 King Crab tops the scales at an immense 100 tons. Intended to hunt and kill other Assault mechs, its clawlike arms are occupied by a pair of massive Autocannon-20s, enough to render nearly any foe inoperable in under 4 seconds of sustained fire. These are backed up by an LRM-15 launcher and a Large Laser to soften foes up at range before its cannons can be brought to bear. 16 tons of armor protect it, but care must be taken; its ammunition supply dries up quickly.