completely random kink/ageplay pondering inspired by a friend's toot; parental/family issues (+ in my case)
it's funny, i am 100% absolutely morally and ethically ok with ageplay for reasons i could detail and defend to the hilt
but i have about -100% interest in DOING it. certainly as the sub/kid in the equation. i could almost see being the top/caregiver just to indulge a friend in need, but...
YIKES i am so done with childhood. mine was warm and happy except for the bullying from my peers and the sense of powerlessness and confusion at social standards.
and something about the sense of being dependent, psychologically much less physically, on someone else is a mighty mighty squick for me
like to the point where i just saw the phrase "mommy and i are one" in a psych study and it TRIGGERED ME a little -- the idea of going back there is horrifying to me, though i think i can accurately model how it's great for other people, especially who did not get the good upbringing they deserved
i love being an adult. shit there are things i love about being in my forties. i love autonomy. i love that my mom and i have been able to approach each other as adults and friends since i was like 12 years old. (losing your dad will do that -- mom and i didn't have TIME for BS authority games after that and we related more like Wise Older Sister and Wayward Little Brother for years). the apple didn't fall far from the tree, but it is definitely a separate and independent organism and thank god.
so yeah, no onesies for the tiger. i was a rotten little cub who -- 100% true RL story -- used to growl at people in the ice cream line at friendly's if they had dessert and i didn't. i am a big big kitty and don't need nobody but my dragon, who i care for as much as she cares for me. and grade school holds no romance for me.
the lowest i've ever gone for a character was 15 -- hesire/kem, my permanently hazmat-encased rubberjackal acolyte. and the whole point of her was that she was raised to be SCARY mature by 15, plus was completely and utterly impossible to access for any kind of biological reproduction.
which i'm ALSO not all that fond of -- why do you think i was a fucking lavalamp for all those years, who only installed a vagina-like port because she got tired of all the requests and caved -- which is a story for another day