mh (---), anxiety, declaration of emotional bankruptcy
you guys i think today finally broke me
i was already stressed as fuck over ear relapse (luckily mild), no home internet, huge backlog at work, a foot injury AND a missing piece of glass on the floor where the cats might get at it. Plus all my doctor's appointments-- and the attendant suspense over the state of my eye and some mildly abnormal checkup results-- have been bumped back a month or more.
The Crazy Cat Lady drama broke me, and I'm still sitting here twitching over the possibility that it's STILL not gonna be over somehow.
I am gonna have zero energy for anything for a while. I can also feel that I have lost my basic chill reserves and any protective layer of padding over my mind that holds back my Inner Homicidal Psycho Jungle Cat.
I may be very clingy, or very unresponsive and cold, or even quite snippy over the next few weeks until/unless things get back to some kind of normal. I really apologize in advance.
I think it's time to concede that I was already Damaged before this. And now that the adrenaline and relief from wife/cats being OK has cleared and reality's setting back in, I am Really Damaged.
God my next therapy appointment is going to be interesting.
mh (---), anxiety, declaration of emotional bankruptcy
@zebratron2084 If you need anything, hon, please reach out... I'll do what I can when I see the messages!
re: mh (---), anxiety, declaration of emotional bankruptcy
@JulieSqveakaroo I do but I don't even know what I'd ask for. Maybe a hitman to quietly dispose of this woman if she ever causes us any trouble again. ;p
re: mh (---), anxiety, declaration of emotional bankruptcy
@JulieSqveakaroo Honestly... it's just the lack of clear resolution on any of this. Plus all the anger over trying our best to help this lady and getting burned YET AGAIN.
What I really need is some reassurance that she's never going to try to start any shit with us, and... that's going to be difficult since she's apparently going to resume feeding the cats, which will bring her to our block AND NEAR OUR OWN CATS on a daily basis.
I'm scared. This woman has a long history of making threats against people, one of the first big red flags I should have seen coming. But the other big red flag was that she would NOT TAKE NO FOR AN ANSWER and would start browbeating and making excuses every time we tried to duck out.
And there's a point where I KNEW this was all gonna end this way, just because we said "oh sure, why not" to a request to feed some cats.
It's just too huge of an anxiety trigger to leave open indefinitely. I might not be okay until MONTHS have passed without hearing from this woman.
Apparently she also has a son on the police force, which is worrisome, though I strongly suspect he is NOT on the Mid-City NOLA police force...
re: mh (---), anxiety, declaration of emotional bankruptcy
@zebratron2084
There is also a good chance the son does not currently share the onset of dementia that this woman seems to be exhibiting...
That armchair diagnosis said, it absolutely sounds like the more distance there is between you and her, the better.