Wanted to share something I posted live on twitter earlier today.

These posts came directly as a result of the news that Chester Bennington (lead singer for Linkin Park) had committed suicide, something I sobbed into my lunch about for almost an hour.

https://mobile.nytimes.com/2017/07/20/arts/music/chester-bennington-linkin-park-dead.html

I wouldn't *be* *here* if it weren't for him and the rest or Linkin Park.

Their music kept me alive, knowing that somewhere, someone else knew and understood what I was going through...

I can't even tell you what that means to a kid who's so scared she'd kill herself to escape.

I did not even *have* the words to describe what was happening to me back then, but they helped me find them.

They're why I got help, why I finally stopped working in defense, why I can even begin to cope with how broken I am inside. And this fucking hurts. >.<

Numb is the story of my relationship with my parents...

Hands Held High was the hurt I felt (and still feel) when something I built was made into a weapon.

Castle of Glass helped me understand myself, @SilverAutomatic, and so many others.

What I've Done is my pledge to never hurt myself as badly as I did before, when I hated and feared myself above all else.

It is also my pledge to do better in future, and to never harm when I can help.

Faint is the voice of a small child, *my voice*, ignored when I needed help and understanding the most. And it's why I'm fighting now.