mh (-)
I have been in declining mental health since DST started and my thoughts and behavior have gotten increasingly self-destructive. I’ve been trying not to talk about it because people already have enough to deal with and they don’t need the whining of a privileged, entitled-feeling tech-bro in their face to go along with it. I should shut the fuck up and get back to work
mh (-)
@Kistaro Find yourself time to recover. If you can manage, let yourself have a day or two off soon and let yourself rest. No code, minimal computer. This helps me a lot
re: mh (-)
@Kistaro Sympathies -
DST yanks me around, too, although it sounds like less nastily than you're getting, this year.
That said? Would you talk to me or Jacel the way you're talking to and about yourself, here? If not, then it's not a useful way to talk to yourself, either. (Verbal abuse leaking into your stream of consciousness is one of the self-reinforcing aspects of depression. You can train yourself out of it.)
re: mh (-)
@Jssra I have always drawn a very strong distinction between what is acceptable for others and what is acceptable for myself. One of my problems is that “doing stuff with people” is so firmly in the “other” camp that I am not able to conceive of how it is something I could be involved in, other than as a part of meeting others’ social and emotional needs.
re: mh (-)
@Kistaro Let me put it this way. You want to help meet the social and emotional needs of others, yes? Depression reduces your ability to do this - it saps both your emotional and physical energy. Allowing depression to set up self-reinforcing habits of thought makes you even less able to do the thing that you want to do.
Therefore, if you want to help others, you need to limit the effects that depression is allowed to have on you. My earlier suggestion is pretty good for that.
mh (-)
@Kistaro except having that privilege doesn't erase your pain and what you're going through
I could also effectively be considered a tech bro considering my work but I also struggle with depression and anxiety a lot. You're not alone