Krissy @BigFatFae@awoo.space

Mood lately has been destructive doms. I want a dom who's just... absolutely obsessed with kink (making me hugefat) to the point of doing terrible things. Doing permanent things that can't be undone, or getting addicted to self enhancement to enable/cause it, or leading me into health issues. Self destructive, me-destructive, or just watching as my fattened body crushes a city... all good >//>

Hi, hello, it's me, I'm tired. Life moves faster than I do, so I kind of feel like I'm in perpetual catchup mode!

But I'm alive and here, and doing my best.

New avatar icons for other forms of mine~ Ultimate calm, ultimate flirt, and ultimate sass~

https://awoo.space/media/Bj7_0UIZyztRKn3-Gp4 https://awoo.space/media/Y3Fy6dNcUry8WeDcMKw https://awoo.space/media/QcQ7u33yH0bUmCmfMwE

I'm fat, and that isn't going away any time soon. Diets, exercise, they didn't work for me. I won't tell anyone how to live their life. But I'll say this: Accepting that you're fat is hard. I struggle with it a lot. But it's been a lot LESS hard than wondering what was wrong with me, trying to fight against biology and failing.

Games, in no particular order:
Final Fantasy 7
Undertale
I Wanna Be The Guy
Legend of Zelda: Link to the Past
Spelunky

Reasons, in no particular order:
The intensity, focus and patience
The message
The storytelling and sense of exploration
The aesthetic and setting
The gameplay and humor

It's.. the Jaria suit.
https://fruityjampaws.tumblr.com/post/166127470416/varia-suit-but-made-entirely-out-of-blue-jeans https://awoo.space/media/jQKNcodv0bMoO1RA17w

Pieces of stories already written in my mind, flashes of thoughts that can't exist without a world to support them, but no such world has come into being. Secrets can't exist until the backbone to a world exists.

Lately, I'm full of all sorts of sporadic inspiration for writing. But I can't ever place that inspiration to words. It's too fleeting?

Radical idea, I know

Lets try something new, brain. Instead of... Worrying and filling with anxiety about what people think of us... Including people who we're incredibly close with... Who have told us that they would let us know if something was wrong... Maybe try... Nnnnnot doing that. Its good to be aware of yourself, but hyper vigilance goes beyond that. Stoppit.

Pension fund report:
For: All employees who are union and full time
Includes: Employee Info (SSN/BD/Hire date), hours worked during month

Okay, easy enough. Just do an hours worked summary report... Wait, something's wrong. It doesn't include... that person? Oh because they switched to On-call this month... How can I get them included anyways?

I ended up using the on-call differential, and STILL had to manually correct a couple. Stupid system limitations

4 months of reports done in 1 hour. Woo. Would have been faster but I had to do a few really weird things to get around system limitations

I have a lot of intuitive sense for this, I feel I can navigate this safely, myself, on both ends. I am sensitive to context and have a stronger than average ability to decipher intent behind people's words. But I have friends who are not as able to navigate this, and I'd like to find words to help explain the process to them, give examples and clearer delineations where it's possible.

I assume like in most cases, it's actually a lot of factors. Context, presentation, word choice, and even intent. (Isolation vs self protection). But intent can be difficult or impossible to intuit. How can one identify when their own actions are potentially abusive, or when someone else's *might* be, from both sides of this?

So.... I have thoughts regarding 'ultimatums'. But I'm still trying to figure out the wordage for it.

When somebody says "You cut THEM out of your life, or ME", that's clearly bad. But when you say "I need you to improve your treatment of me, or I won't be able to continue the relationship", there's more grey area, room for it to be okay. What specific component or context can make this okay when the first is so clearly not okay without extensive damning context?

The creator said that putting in achievements, deciding what would have been considered 'good' would have ruined the game for a lot of people.

And I think there's a LOT to that.

The standards set out for us by others are inherently flawed. They do not exist within our world, with our experiences, with our limitations. All of your accomplishments, no matter how mundane, could be amazing if someone were given the same tools and experiences you had.

Playing is equivalent to learning how to walk when you have both no tactile feedback, and no pre-existing knowledge of the mechanics of which muscles enable running. It is actually entirely possible to run with the weird controls. But for a lot of people? Just scooting along on the ground, getting to the end in less than 20 minutes, was an accomplishment.

At one point, the creator was asked whether they'd ever considered putting out a version of the game with achievements

Have you ever heard of the game QWOP?
It's okay if you haven't, feel free to look it up real quick. tl;dr version, it's a game where you attempt to run an olympic sprint using only the qwop keys. It... Is not easy, for a multitude of reasons. It's largely played for humor, but... There's an analogy I want to make from it.