when someone does something that upsets me, I generally appreciate hearing their reasoning for doing it. Going and explaining to me the circumstances that led to you inadvertently doing this rude thing leads to greater understanding and thus more sincere forgiveness from me.

So why does almost everyone else find it very rude when I try to explain myself after a misunderstanding? I make it very clear that I recognise that I was in the wrong, so they can't think I'm trying to defend my actions

context: someone said they forgot that variables (in an algebra context) could be multi-digit, and I thought they were joking.

They weren't, which just made me extremely confused because, from my perspective, that would be like forgetting water is wet. It was so strange that it was actually jarring and I just.... can't understand anything after that point

I tried to apologize for thinking it was a joke, and I tried to explain why I thought that way and the person just got more upset at me

Follow

I'd really appreciate people's thoughts on this... I don't understand things and I want to understand things so I can stop being accidentally very rude

@Felthry My best guess is it comes across as condescending somehow.

I wish I could provide more insight beyond that, but I'm probably just as clueless as you. I've only learned it's a thing that just isn't done and moved on.

Sign in to participate in the conversation
Awoo Space

Awoo.space is a Mastodon instance where members can rely on a team of moderators to help resolve conflict, and limits federation with other instances using a specific access list to minimize abuse.

While mature content is allowed here, we strongly believe in being able to choose to engage with content on your own terms, so please make sure to put mature and potentially sensitive content behind the CW feature with enough description that people know what it's about.

Before signing up, please read our community guidelines. While it's a very broad swath of topics it covers, please do your best! We believe that as long as you're putting forth genuine effort to limit harm you might cause – even if you haven't read the document – you'll be okay!