Kistaro Windrider @Kistaro@awoo.space

For as flashy as the iPhone X is, and as much as I like the idea of an OLED display, I really miss the display width of my former 6S+ and the X doesn't solve that, so 8+ it is

I am not sure if I lost my tolerance for coffee, or if it always made my anxiety that much worse but I never really noticed it

"Good morning, small dinosaur!"

"CAW. CAW. CAW. CAW. CAW."

To teach myself pico-8, because I have to start somewhere, I am porting Blockers & Finders, or at least a crude version of it.

Amaroq is not quite an ideal Mastodon client. It is kind of twitchy about boosting things; I keep accidentally boosting stuff I'm trying to scroll past because I grabbed the timeline in the wrong spot.

I was vaguely in a bunch of pornographic furry Telegram groups for a while that catered to my fetishes (rubber, goo, snakes...), then got self-conscious and left them, and I regret doing so now

Content warnings on Mastodon make me way more willing to talk about things I worry about making other people uncomfortable about. Viva la <lj-cut>!

It's hard to hit a target of "enough THC to reduce depressive symptoms for 2 days", but "little enough to avoid increasing tolerance to THC and also anandamide, thereby worsening depression"

I undershot it badly last night and now I don't know whether to have worse depressive symptoms tomorrow and stay on schedule, or use more, now.

I got my tolerance back down in 1 month of "not quite enough" alternate day concentrate use, after 7 months to raise it, so maybe I should worry less.

I'm not comfortable with my own sexual orientation. I put myself forward as pansexual, but that's more aspirational than accurate.

More than half the time, I am specifically interested in cock, and I am almost exclusively interested in gender nonconformant people. (Awkward phrasing courtesy of that one cis guy whose performance of gender is beautifully alien. Yes, you know who you are 💜)

I'm still worried that I'm some kind of "tranny chaser".

And then there was a shampoo spill in the garage. Cleaned up. My garage floor has never had such luxurious hair.

I dreamed about DJ Tiësto sleeping on my couch for a night, in which we brainstormed the plot outline for an electronic opera about the ongoing rivalry between Weather-Man and The Weatherman.

Weather-Man is a superhero who controls the weather, locally and briefly. The Weatherman is a supervillain who is a maliciously inaccurate professional meteorologist.

I don't remember the details. This is probably for the better.

Welp, at least when I write timestamps in my notebooks now (as I do on every new subtopic), I am not immediately calculating time until @Jacel departs and flinching and getting sad about it 😐

I just realized that I feel like I'm greedy if I try to see a friend more than once a week or so. What the fuck, brain

I will miss @Jacel very badly while sie isn't here, I always do, but the fundamentally unaddressed depression is what scares me the most.

The thing that upsets me most about @Jacel having to go back to Wales is that I know sie doesn't get the kind of social contact sie needs there, and I feel powerless to do anything about it. Depression has been rough on both of us and there's so much less I can do to help

I should probably give up on buying cooking spray and just use cooking oil (or olive oil) and a paper towel, given my overall level of dexterity with the sprays. I end up using the paper towel anyway...

Restore 500 hit points to a British person
https://awoo.space/media/v38ICwmBc39PBtmz8L4

The Matrix

The Matrix Reloaded

The Matrix Revolutions

The Matrix & Knuckles